Joke of the Day!

[Stainless]

!!!!

[ChumpChange]

A guy goes to the Post Office to apply for a job.

The interviewer asks him, "Are you allergic to anything?"

He replies, "Yes- caffeine."

"Have you ever been in the military service?

"Yes," he says "I was in Afghanistan for two years."

The interviewer says, "That will give you 5 extra points toward

employment."

Then he asks, "Are you disabled in any way?"

The guy says, "Yes. A bomb exploded near me and I lost both of my

testicles.

The interviewer grimaces and then says, "O.K.. You've got enough points

for me to hire you right now. Our normal hours are from 8:00 A.M. to

4: 00 P.M. You can start tomorrow at 10:00 - and plan on starting at 10:00 A.M .

every day."

The guy is puzzled and asks, "If the work hours are from 8:00 A.M. to

4:00 PM. , why don't you want me to here until 10:00 A.M .?"

"This is a Government job," the interviewer says, "For the first two

hours, we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls..

[ChumpChange]

Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Officer asked a young Engineer fresh out of MIT, "And what starting salary were you looking for?" The Engineer replies, "In the region of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package." The interviewer inquires, "Well, what would you say to a package of 5-weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every 2 years say, a red Corvette?" The Engineer sits up straight and says, "Wow! Are you kidding?" And the interviewer replies, "Yeah, but you started it."

[ChumpChange]

Yesterday scientists revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones. To prove their theory, the scientists fed 100 men 12 pints of beer and observed that 100% of them gained weight, talked excessively without making sense, became emotional, and couldn't drive. No further testing is planned.

[Eli]

Yesterday scientists revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones. To prove their theory, the scientists fed 100 men 12 pints of beer and observed that 100% of them gained weight, talked excessively without making sense, became emotional, and couldn't drive. No further testing is planned.

I'm not sure I get this joke


Sent from my Bat Cave!!!

[riverrunner1984]

A woman is at home when she hears someone knock at the door.She goes to the door and opens the door to see a man standing there.
He asks the lady, 'Do you have a vagina?'
She slams the door in disgust.
The next morning she hears a knock at the door and it is the same man and he asks the same question of the woman, 'Do you have a vagina?'
She slams the door again.
Later that night when her husband gets home she tells him what has happened for the last two days. The husband tells the wife in a loving and concerned voice 'Honey, I am taking tomorrow off to be home just in case this guy shows up again.'
The next morning they hear a knock and both
run for the door. The husband says to the wife in a whispered
voice, 'Honey, I'm going to hide behind the door and listen and if it is the same guy I want you to answer yes to the question because I want to see where the bastard is going with it.' She nods yes to her husband and opens the door. Sure enough the same fellow is standing there and asks the same question;
'Do you have a vagina?'
'Yes, actually I do,' she says.
The man replies..
'Good! Would you mind telling your husband
to leave my wife's alone and start using yours?'

[ChumpChange]

My boss told me to have a good day. So I went home.

[HB Vic]

My boss told me to have a good day. So I went home.

Usually when someone tells me to have a good day its a bad thing lol